John Ibson: The Honeymooners
[John Ibson, professor of American studies at Cal State Fullerton, is the author of "Picturing Men: A Century of Male Relationships in Everyday American Photography."]
Steve and I have been together 32 years, yet after a recent trip to Vancouver, we're newlyweds. And while I'm a 66-year-old professor of American studies, this particular Canadian journey taught me fresh lessons about myself and my country....
I've taught the power and necessity of ritual for my 38 years as a professor of American culture. I've also taught the need to see matters in historical perspective. As boys, neither Steve nor I ever expected to marry another guy. Instead, we were barely able to admit how much other guys turned us on and how much we yearned just to be with them. Being young and gay back then was almost always marred by denial and shame.
Things are immeasurably better. When I first started teaching, the American Psychiatric Assn. considered me mentally ill just for being gay. And in the year Steve and I became a couple, 1978, Californians voted on a ballot measure that, if passed, would've ousted Steve, as an openly gay person, from his profession as a public school teacher.
Here's the professor professing: Things are better now, and not simply for LGBT people but for our whole society, which has become not only more tolerant but also more mature and morally sound as gay rights have slowly but surely increased.
So what truly generates the resistance to marriage between people like Steve and me? The "threat to marriage" rationale is patently bogus. But clearly there are many threats to marriage in modern life; the institution is truly in some jeopardy. Those who oppose same-sex marriage have something to explain in the fact that their sentiments are strongest in precisely those states where marriage and family life are already in the most difficulty, as measured by rates of divorce, spousal abuse and pregnancy outside marriage. I swear, Steve and I have had nothing to do with that....
Read entire article at LA Times
Steve and I have been together 32 years, yet after a recent trip to Vancouver, we're newlyweds. And while I'm a 66-year-old professor of American studies, this particular Canadian journey taught me fresh lessons about myself and my country....
I've taught the power and necessity of ritual for my 38 years as a professor of American culture. I've also taught the need to see matters in historical perspective. As boys, neither Steve nor I ever expected to marry another guy. Instead, we were barely able to admit how much other guys turned us on and how much we yearned just to be with them. Being young and gay back then was almost always marred by denial and shame.
Things are immeasurably better. When I first started teaching, the American Psychiatric Assn. considered me mentally ill just for being gay. And in the year Steve and I became a couple, 1978, Californians voted on a ballot measure that, if passed, would've ousted Steve, as an openly gay person, from his profession as a public school teacher.
Here's the professor professing: Things are better now, and not simply for LGBT people but for our whole society, which has become not only more tolerant but also more mature and morally sound as gay rights have slowly but surely increased.
So what truly generates the resistance to marriage between people like Steve and me? The "threat to marriage" rationale is patently bogus. But clearly there are many threats to marriage in modern life; the institution is truly in some jeopardy. Those who oppose same-sex marriage have something to explain in the fact that their sentiments are strongest in precisely those states where marriage and family life are already in the most difficulty, as measured by rates of divorce, spousal abuse and pregnancy outside marriage. I swear, Steve and I have had nothing to do with that....